I woke up today and went to a 6am yoga class, stopped for a coffee on the way home and had time to make my breakfast and lunch. Feeling stretched and energized and ready to take on the day.
Thought I’d also start my day with one of my favorite quotes, that a dear friend wrote in a journal she presented me before I left on my study-abroad adventure back in college.
“Like shrinks or expands, in proportion to one’s courage.”
Too true.
J.
This is a short article I enjoy reading from time to time to help re-enforce my decision making process. The daily grind of negativity from society can weigh on you and its important to remember simple lessons like this:
Each morning I wake up and say to myself, you have two
choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or ..
you can choose to be in a bad mood
I choose to be in a good
mood.’
Each time something bad happens,
I can choose to be a victim or…I can choose to learn
from it. I choose to learn from
it.
Every time someone comes to me
complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining
or… I can point out the positive side of life. I
choose the positive side of life.’
‘Yeah, right,
it’s not that easy,’ I protested.
‘Yes, it is,’ he said. ‘Life is
all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every
situation is a choice. You choose how you react to
situations. You choose how people affect your
mood.
You choose to be
in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It’s your
choice how you live your life.
Of all the classes that I took about adolescent social work, community building, social change on a policy level, Board governance and volunteer management, from teachers with insane resumes and books in their name; what grad school taught me most was how to breathe.
I won’t belittle my own intelligence or the amount of money I spent to attend a prestigious university (with such smart people running the place, you would think your graduate experience wouldn’t cost more than your earning potential in said field…but i digress). I did in fact learn a lot more about being an effective therapist and learned how to best meet a client where they stand, not forcing them to conform to your agenda. But the thing that I carry with me and use daily, now that I am not in a direct service role and in my personal life (especially in my personal life), is breathing.
My first semester of grad school, after having taken a year off to decide if I was really going to do it, left me feeling inept and unsure of my ability to do the work. I was so stressed and my body felt stressed, to the point of discomfort while I was sitting in class or working. One evening in a debriefing class used to augment our field practicums (internships) my instructor passed out an article about self care. Breathing was No.2 on the list of ways to care for yourself and your body.
Even if you aren’t losing it in graduate school (I did settle down eventually, and kick-ass at getting that MSW behind my name, in case your wondering) maybe you are working in your first job post graduation ,or you have been working for years and are facing a job transition, or your kids are driving you nuts, maybe you are having an easy go of things at the moment except this one work project (and boss) that is driving you nuts…try this:
sit still.
zone out.
maybe close your eyes if you feel like it.
breathe in through your nose with your mouth shut.
big, until your lungs hurt and your stomach is sticking out.
then, slowly release your breath through your mouth, until your stomach scrunches up with the effort of pushing out the air.
Repeat, 3-4 times.
All that oxygen makes you realize the speed at which you’ve been hurtling around your world. Makes you realize the stress you have been holding between your shoulders. those seconds, just breathing, lowers your heart rate, stops the thoughts scrolling and slows things down to a manageable level.
How often did I think about my breathing before the self-care article? Little to none.
Now, I try to remember to take at least a set of three deep breaths a day. This helps me realize that I am even feeling tense as my body relaxes. It also gives me perspective and sometimes clarity.
Try it, I don’t think you’ll be disappointed.
J.
Sometimes I really love to start my day listening to an MLK speech. I am not a particularly religious person. I do however consider myself very spiritual…… and for those of you out there that say that is a cop out and I need to commit to believing in God or not believing in God please hit ALT F4 now, stop trying to force your religion on me and everyone else you see, besides if you thought that your probably the type of person who trolls people for using condoms or for being gay so I don’t have any interest in talking to you.
Back to one of my favorite videos of all time. This is MLK’s last speech. And right around the 1:30 mark it starts to get pretty amazing (and also kind of spooky). If you look closely at his eyes during this portion of the speech, when he talks about living a long life, and about going up to the mountain top to look over at the promise land…. I swear it looks like he is looking directly at “GOD” or at least at a place that the rest of us can not see…. regardless of your religious affiliation take 3 minutes out of your day and watch this video… its fucking great.